>> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center, the national broadcasting company presents -- tonight's guests are -- and featuring the legendary roots crew. and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, that's what i'm talking about. hey! that's a great new york city crowd right there. welcome. welcome, everybody, to "late night with jimmy fallon." yeah. it's going to be a fun show tonight. love this. you guys -- [ cheers ] welcome. welcome to the show. here's what people are talking about. the northeast is bracing for a snow storm this weekend. boy, oh, boy. some forecasters say that it will only be two inches while other forecasters are predicting 30 inches. [ laughter ] when asked why they couldn't make a better prediction, meteorologists were like, "uh, we're meteorologists." [ laughter ] actually, they are saying new york could receive up to 12 inches of snow this weekend, or as subway calls it, 11 inches. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] that's good, yeah. ♪

i'm so excited. we have joel mchale on the show tonight. >> steve: oh! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we also have al roker. [ cheers and applause ] roker was going to be the first guest, but i heard he likes going number two. so we -- [ laughter ] >> steve: that's good. that's good. that is good. >> jimmy: that's right, al roker is here. it's weird though. backstage he asked me where the bathrooms are, and before i could finish he was like, "never mind." [ laughter ] is that weird? we got to get these jokes out of the way. >> steve: weird, weird. yeah, get them out of the way. >> jimmy: he's about to come out. we have to get the jokes out of the way. [ light laughter ] we love al roker. this is interesting. president obama's chief speech writer is leaving the white house to pursue a career as a hollywood screenwriter. yeah. we actually got a clip of his first movie. but, to be honest, it still seems like he's in speech writing mode. take a look at this. ♪

>> it's great to be here, columbus, ohio. [ cheers ] >> i love you. look, over the past two years, i have signed into law $1.4 trillion in spending cuts and closed tax loopholes to make sure that top earning americans begin to pay their fair share. >> the fact is though, we can't finish the job of deficit reduction through spending cuts alone. we can't. we just -- >> yes, we can! yes, we can. [ light laughter ] ♪ >> god bless you, and god bless the united states of america. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: there you go. see, that's what i'm talking about right there. [ cheers and applause ] you guys, this weekend is the chinese new year, which will celebrate -- [ cheers ] which will celebrate the year of the snake. crazy that it's snake already. i'm still writing "dragon" on all my checks.

[ laughter and applause ] ♪ >> steve: yee-ha! >> jimmy: check this out. last night, runners from around the world competed in the annual race to the top of the empire state building. yeah, but there's already a scandal brewing. it turns out, one of the competitors tested positive for elevator. [ laughter and applause ] that's what i heard. here's some local news. after -- [ laughter ] some local news. after passing a ban on large sugary sodas, mayor bloomberg is considering a ban on styrofoam cups. seriously? at this point i'm starting to think 7-eleven slept with his girlfriend. i mean, what happened? [ laughter ] and finally, former massachusetts senator scott brown is in talks to become a contributor on fox news. first they have to check his background and test his knowledge of current events. and if he fails, he'll start monday. [ laughter ] we have a great show tonight. give it up for the roots! ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we do have a wonderful show tonight. he's a very funny guy. from "the soup" and community, joel mchale is here. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: oh, what a nice fella. >> jimmy: we love having him here. he's our favorite guy. from nbc's "today" show. al roker is stopping by. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: yeah! >> jimmy: and we have music from matt pond. it's really good stuff tonight. [ cheers and applause ] talented musician. hey, guys, it's time to take a look at the stories making headlines today and weigh the good with the bad. it's time for "pros and cons." here we go. ♪ pros and cons and pros and cons and pros ♪ >> jimmy: tonight, we'll taking a look at the pros and cons of the grammys. the awards are this sunday night. it's always a good time. the roots are nominated for best rap album. [ cheers and applause ] for "undun."

good luck, guys. and i, actually -- my album, "blow your pants off" is nominated for best comedy album. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: oh, come on. >> jimmy: either way adele is going to beat us both. somehow. i don't know how. let's take a look at the pros and cons of the grammys. here we go. pro, gotye is nominated for "somebody that i used to know." con, manti te'o is nominated for "somebody i thought i knew but never existed." [ laughter ] both good songs. >> steve: yeah, both good. >> jimmy: equally good songs. pro, hearing taylor swift perform "we are never ever getting back together." con, hearing chris brown and rihanna performing "we are never ever getting back together, well, okay, maybe just this once." [ laughter ] excited to hear that one. pro, president bill clinton is nominated for best spoken word. con, it's for his reading of "fifty shades of grey." [ laughter ] i didn't even know he did that. >> steve: i want to listen to that. >> jimmy: i didn't even know he did that. [ imitating clinton ] i love the way -- [ imitating clinton ] >> jimmy: i love nipple clamps. [ laughter ] >> steve: yeah.

[ imitating clinton ] red bottoms! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: pro, kanye west is nominated for six grammys. con, he's prepared seven acceptance speeches. [ laughter ] that's a bad sign. that means -- yeah. >> steve: or a good sign. >> jimmy: or a good one. pro, mumford & sons could win for best rock song. con, "sanford and sons" could win for best theme song. [ laughter ] that is a good theme song. you guys got it? ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: the roots, they're just amazing. a grammy for that. pro, my album "blow your pants off" is nominated for best comedy record. [ cheers and applause ] con, my lyrics were meant to be soul-searching and confessional, and everyone thought i was joking. [ laughter ] [ audience aws ]

>> steve: oh, no. >> jimmy: i guess i'm just god's misunderstood clown. [ light laughter ] >> steve: i hear bill clinton is going to do a reading of it. [ imitating clinton ] spank me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: pro, coldplay got best rock performance nomination for their song "charlie brown." con, here's a clip of the song. [ muffled voice ] catchy. [ cheers and applause ] just catchy. and finally, pro, adele is up for best performance by a female. con, so is steven tyler. there you go. that is the "pros and cons." we'll be back with more "late night," everybody. come on! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ erhas asked real women to try our go sleeveless deodorant for five days.

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back to the show, everybody. hey, have you guys ever listened to music with your headphones on and you sing out loud and you think you sound really awesome, but really not -- [ laughter ] -- not awesome? well, that's what this next game is all about. it's time to play "sounds good?" >> hit me. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ it sounds good, yeah >> jimmy: this is "sounds good?" the singing competition that puts your voice to the test.

let's meet tonight's lucky singers. come on over, guys. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: nice to see you. welcome to the show. what is your name, and where are you from? >> micah from brooklyn. >> jimmy: hey, welcome, mike. >> marco, i'm from new york. >> jimmy: marco from new york. >> caroline, i'm from houston. >> jimmy: welcome, welcome to the show. [ cheers and applause ] here's how it's going to work. in a moment, you'll each put on these headphones and sing along to the song that's playing in them. here's the catch -- they're noise canceling headphones, so you won't be able to hear yourself singing, but we all will. [ light laughter ] now, throughout the song, our crazy sound guy, munson rawlings, will be randomly -- [ laughter ] -- changing the pitch -- [ light laughter ] -- and you'll have to match it. how are you doing, munson? >> eat [ bleep ], [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what? [ laughter ] what? [ laughter ] what's wrong with that dude, man? that's your buddy, man. [ laughter ] he's weird.

okay. if the pitch goes high, just sing high. if it goes low, you just sing low. in the end, the audience will judge the best all-around performance, so make sure you really go for it, okay? any questions? all right, contestant number one, you're up first. the song we've chosen for you is "what makes you beautiful" by one direction. i'm confident you're going to nail it. now, the lyrics will be on the monitor in front of you. i encourage you to use that. your performance will begin once you hear the music playing in the headphones. >> all right. >> jimmy: all right, go take your place, my friend. spotlight, please. [ laughter ] [ cheers ] ♪ you're insecure don't know what for you're turning heads when you walk through the door ♪ ♪ don't need makeup to cover up being the way that you are is enough ♪ ♪ everyone else in the room can see it everyone else but you ♪ ♪ baby, you light up my

world like nobody else the way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed ♪ ♪ but when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell you don't know you don't know you're beautiful ♪ >> jimmy: very good. that's very good. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ wow. really great. no, stay, come over here, yeah. let's take a look back at some of your highlights there. ♪ when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell you don't know you don't know -- ♪ >> jimmy: there you go, very good. [ laughter ] all right, you can head over to the back of the line over there. [ cheers and applause ] all right, contestant number two, it's time to meet your destiny. the song we've chosen for you is "since you've been gone" by kelly clarkson. [ cheers and applause ] here are your headphones. and say hi to munson rawlings on the way over there. [ laughter ] sorry, i'm sorry. [ laughter ] suck it, man. what's the problem, man? all right.

spotlight, please. ♪ here's the thing we started out friends it was cool but it was all pretend ♪ ♪ yeah, yeah since you've been gone ♪ [ laughter ] ♪ and all i'd ever hear me say is how i pictured me with you ♪ ♪ that's all you'd ever hear me say since you've been gone ♪ [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] ♪ i can breathe for the first time i'm so moving on yeah, yeah ♪ ♪ thanks to you now i get what i want since you've been gone ♪ >> jimmy: there you go. very nice. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ thank you so much. great, moving performance.

>> yeah? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah, amazing. let's take a look back at some of your highlights there. ♪ i can breathe for the first time i'm so moving on yeah, yeah ♪ >> jimmy: okay, very good. almost brought a tear to my eye. go take a spot at the end there. how you doing, pal? >> i'm good. >> jimmy: are you ready? >> yeah. >> jimmy: the song we've chosen for you is "livin' on a prayer" by bon jovi. [ cheers and applause ] great song. here are your headphones. go take your place in the spotlight. are you doing okay over there, munson? [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: spotlight, please. ♪ we've got to hold on to what we got it doesn't make a difference if we make it or not ♪ ♪ we've got each other and that's a lot for love we'll give it a shot ♪ ♪ whoa we're halfway there whoa we're livin' on a prayer

take my hand and we'll make it i swear ♪ ♪ whoa livin' on a prayer livin' on a prayer ♪ >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. [ cheers and applause ] wow. fantastic. >> thank you. >> jimmy: that was fantastic. nice job. let's take a look back at some of your highlights there. ♪ whoa we're halfway there whoa, we're living on -- ♪ >> jimmy: wow. all right. audience, now it is time for you to pick the winner. was it singer number one? [ cheers and applause ] was it singer number two? [ cheers and applause ] or was it singer number three? [ cheers and applause ] well, the winner is number two. congratulations. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ you are the winner. as the winner today, you will be taking home your very own pair of bose noise cancelling headphones -- [ laughter ] -- so you can continue your

singing career for years to come. [ applause ] but, don't worry, no one here goes home empty-handed. you will each be taking home these official "late night with jimmy fallon" hoodies. there you go right there. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, you guys, for playing "sounds good?" we'll be right back with joel mchale, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ in the last five hours? i played a round of golf. then i read a book while teachi myself how to play guitar; ran ten miles while knitting myself a sweater; jumped out of a plane. finally, i became a ping pong master while recording my debut album. how you ask? with 5-hour energy. i get hours of energy now -- no crash later. wait to see the next five hours.

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest not only hosts e's "the soup," he also stars on nbc's "community," which returns for its fourth

season tonight. ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the very funny, joel mchale. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. this is what i'm talking about. joel mchale, that's an entrance right there. >> yeah, very excited. >> jimmy: nice to see you, my friend. >> justin bieber's in the building! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i know he is. >> he's here! >> jimmy: yeah, thank you -- are you excited about bieber? >> oh, my gosh. i waited with like 12, 15-year-old girls outside for hours. and then i'm like, "i'm sorry, i gotta go on jimmy fallon, guys. i'll see you later." >> jimmy: thank you for making it in here. >> by the way, i was backstage with al roker. >> jimmy: oh yeah. >> and he turned his back to me for a moment and just [ bleep ] all over me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh. oh. you're kidding. al, why is he doing this? that's his thing now. >> he's like, "i'm so sorry.

i'm sorry." and then he [ bleep ] on my publicist. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: why is he doing this? it's just awful. >> i think it's his cool trademark now. >> jimmy: yeah, that's main move. yeah, they have to do this now. he has to do these bits. i saw you on "the view" this morning. >> oh! you're a big watcher of "the view?" >> jimmy: i do, i do. i do like to view "the view." >> yeah, barbara's sick. she has the plague. >> jimmy: no, no, no. [ laughter ] it's chicken pox. it's chicken pox. >> chicken pox, whatever. thought it was small pox? >> jimmy: no, no. no one gets that. >> yes, i was on there, and -- one of the -- one of the kardashians was on. >> jimmy: kris jenner, right? >> the kris jenner. who now has her own talk show. it's about how to apply mascara. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: is it hard to do, like to run into people that you make jokes about? >> with them it is. only -- they're very nice, but i am deadly afraid of bruce for multiple reasons. [ light laughter ] and i have tried to avoid -- she's like "you just tried -- you run away from us."

i'm like, "yes. he could throw a javelin at me." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. "i have kids!" >> i'm afraid of that man, yeah. and he is a very scary looking human being. [ light laughter ] there was a gypsy curse put on him when he -- >> jimmy: that is not true. [ laughter ] >> yes, it's a curse! it's a gypsy curse. >> jimmy: no, that is not true at all. >> no, he told the surgeon, he was just like, "eh, you know, a little off of ears, just leave the nose and --" [ light laughter ] sorry. he is going to kill me. >> jimmy: no, no. >> have you ever run into him? >> jimmy: man. i -- i hate telling this story because it's just awful. but i ran into him. >> really, something happened? >> jimmy: i ran into him, this is the last time i'll tell the story because i hate it so much. i was sick to my stomach. i was at the olympics in london. competing. >> competing. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i was competing. >> yeah. dressage. >> jimmy: i go to get coffee. i'm about to do a bit with bob costas. i'm about to get a coffee. >> name dropping. >> jimmy: thank you. i was going to the commissary,

the nbc commissary to get a coffee, and i see bruce jenner. and i go, "oh, i don't want to run into him." >> right, no one does. [ laughter ] he's gonna kill me. >> jimmy: i made a joke about his face. he's probably a nice guy, but i made a je of something like, 50% of his face is recyclable. [ laughter ] something like that. and then -- so i don't wanna run into him, so i go -- because i don't know him, and i don't really dislike the guy. he's a legend. >> right. >> jimmy: so i see him, and he's got a double breasted suit on. he's got two earrings. he's got the prince valiant haircut. [ laughter ] >> and you were like, "latoya!" [ laughter ] i mean -- >> jimmy: so i go the other way. i go the other way. i don't want confrontation. >> right, right, right, right. >> jimmy: i don't like confrontation, so i go the other way and i see tom brokaw in the hallway. he goes -- [ as brokaw ] "hello, jimmy fallon. [ laughter ] jimmy, great to see you here." >> are you sure it wasn't -- [ unintelligible noises ] it wasn't drunk jimmy stewart who came up to you? [ laughter ]

>> jimmy: drunk jimmy stewart. [ as brokaw ] "jimmy fallon, so good to see you here in london at the olympics." [ laughter ] >> greatest broadcaster of all time. >> jimmy: he doesn't quite talk like that. so i'm talking to him, and then he goes, i'm talking to him, he goes -- [ as brokaw ] "good to see you. bruce, bruce?" >> oh, no. >> jimmy: and i go oh, no, no, no. so bruce comes over, and -- and he goes -- i go, hey, nice to meet you. i go, hey, bruce. he goes, "how's it going, man?" and i go -- [ laughter ] >> you're very surprised. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. he was surprised to see me. he was surprised to see me. and so i go, "very nice -- you doing the olympics?" he goes, "no, i'm heading back to l.a. we're gonna -- catching a plane right now." oh, okay. well, have a good flight. so he leaves, and i go, phew, that was just awkward. and i say good-bye to tom, he goes -- [ as brokaw ] "take care, jimmy." [ laughter ] and then i run, i go to the commissary and i go, "phew, thank god that got away." he was actually a nice guy, like, no confrontation. i get my coffee, who walks back

in the commissary, but bruce jenner. and he gets an apple and a banana. >> he fashions a javelin out of them. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this exactly what he did to me. right? you're me waiting on line for coffee, and i'm bruce jenner. i go, "hey, take care, bruce." and he goes, "stop saying [ bleep ] about my face." [ laughter and applause ] felt like i was going to vomit. felt like i was going to throw up. i was like, "what just happened?" that was the weirdest thing in the whole wide world and i haven't said anything about him since. [ laughter ] >> did you go like -- [ laughter ] you should've gone like -- you should -- until this moment. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. now i'm realizing, yeah, yeah. >> you should've said like, "bye, lord voldemort." [ laughter ] [ applause ] or you could've been like, "did you see how mad bruce jenner -- oh, i didn't even recognize you with your face." [ laughter ]

>> jimmy: yeah, if i could think about it. >> it's a ring wraith from "lord of the rings." >> jimmy: he let's -- i want -- i want to talk about "community." >> yes. it returns tonight. >> jimmy: earlier tonight. >> earlier tonight. >> jimmy: it returns earlier tonight. [ cheers and applause ] >> it returned earlier tonight. >> jimmy: yes. and next week on valentine's day you guys are showing your halloween episode. >> yeah. [ light laughter ] we were supposed to air on october 19th. it would've been perfect for the week after to air our halloween episode -- [ light laughter ] because bruce jenner's in it. it's terrifying. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, he's not. >> al roker shows -- no. so then -- then as we go on, then there's a thanksgiving episode. that'll be in april, and then -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: why? nbc just screwed it up? >> sweeps is then perfect for our christmas episode! i'm not joking. >> jimmy: oh my gosh. >> yeah, they decided to just keep the tension going until february. so, fine with me if you guys -- i know you might be confused

but -- >> jimmy: yeah. i know, i think "community" fans might enjoy it. >> yes, they might think it's all part of the plan. here's joel mchale on next week's episode of "community." >> happy halloween parties, everyone. you all look great. >> pig. let me guess, you're a flimsy excuse to be shirtless wearing silk underwear. >> and you're as wrong as you are welcome. now this year i planned a two-person costume with annie. she's going as my ring girl. [ screams ] ♪ >> pretty freaky deaky, huh? >> annie, no. i meant the boxing match ring girl. the sexy one that hold the round numbers. >> yeah, see, this is why we can't just text about it, jeff. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: see, that's what i'm talking about. very funny show. >> thank you. >> jimmy: happy it's back. happy that it returns. >> thank you. we will have no problem beating "american idol" and "the big bang theory." [ laughter ] should be fine. >> jimmy: should be fine. >> should be fine. >> jimmy: no one watches that. >> no! >> jimmy: no. i want to play a game with you, if you don't mind. it involves a hard boiled egg.

>> oh. all right. >> jimmy: it involves raw eggs. >> okay? [ scattered cheers ] >> jimmy: it involves smashing it into our forehead. [ cheers ] >> i -- i am going to beat your ass at this game. >> jimmy: all right, here we go. joel mchale and i are playing egg russian roulette when we get back. >> it's going down. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ what are you doing? oh, hey. using night-vision goggles to keep an eye on my spicy buffalo wheat thins to make sure nobody touches them. who's gonna take your wheat thins? um, i don't know. an intruder, the dog, bigfoot, ted from next door. hey, could you get the light? i love you. [ loud crash ] what is going on?! honey, i was close! it's a yeti! ted! check it out! a yeti! [ male announcer ] must! have! wheat thins! officewith an online package new colincluding: domain name,y! website builder with five pages and basic email just $49.99!

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] welcome back, everybody. i'm here with the very funny joel mchale, and we're going head to head in "egg russian roulette." higgins, let's explain how this works. [ laughter ] >> steve: here in my hand, i have a dozen eggs, one dozen eggs. >> jimmy: what's wrong with your voice? >> steve: i need a lozenge. >> jimmy: how many dozen? >> steve: one dozen. >> jimmy: a baker's dozen? >> steve: no, 12. only 12, 10 plus 2. eight of them have been hard boiled! four of them are still raw. you and joel will take turns selecting one egg at a time and smashing it on top of your head. you won't know which eggs are raw. [ laughter ]

and which are hard boiled. but once you choose an egg, you must smash that egg on your head. no put backs. first person to smash two raw eggs on his head loses. joel, as guest of this show, you will choose the first egg. [ laughter ] [ clears throat ] egg, first egg. >> you're -- you're going down. [ laughter ] that's what -- no. [ laughter ] i'm going to choose the biggest one. >> steve: choose carefully. good luck! >> jimmy: i know, suspense. >> it's sad that this scares me. [ laughter ] ♪ [ audience ohs ] ♪ [ applause ] >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. >> brand new suit. >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. >> brand new suit!

>> jimmy: oh, my gosh. >> steve: eggs don't stain. >> eggs don't stain? >> steve: no, they just -- go. good luck! [ laughter ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. >> i know how this is going to go. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. i'm so sorry. so sorry. >> you're going to need roker for two segments now. [ laughter ] >> steve: good luck. ♪ [ laughter ] ♪ [ audience sighs ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right. >> steve: choose wisely.

>> can i do something from "the deer hunter"? >> steve: mao, mao! giddy mao! [ audience ohs ] >> "the deer hunter" with de niro. >> jimmy: neither of us were in that movie, so -- [ laughter ] this egg just looks weird. doesn't it? >> yeah, maybe there's a chick in there. [ laughter ] i'm having trouble seeing, by the way. [ laughter ] [ audience ohs ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, higgins. >> brand new suit. >> jimmy: dolce and gabbana. >> yes. they are very disappointed right now. i want this one, but i know it's going to be wrong. screw it. >> jimmy: good luck. >> "community" thursday nights at 8:00 p.m. [ laughter ]

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: darn it! this one looks like it's boiled. >> take it. [ laughter ] go ahead and take it. it looks boiled. it should be fine. no problem there. there should be no tension. you should just nonchalantly crush it against your forehead. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm second guessing it. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> steve: 1-1. >> thank you, odds! thank you, odds! >> jimmy: so mad. >> steve: two will go in. one go out. [ laughter ] ♪ [ audience ohs ]

[ applause ] >> we're going to get out of here, right? we're going to get out of here. we're going to get out of here. hurts, doesn't it? >> jimmy: it does. [ laughter ] >> come on, come on! break an embryo over your face. [ laughter ] [ audience ohs ] [ applause ] >> steve: yeah. there's a 50/50 chance. two raw, two cooked. which will it be? >> i'm going to take this one. >> jimmy: yeah, that's the one you should take. >> it has a little tear on it for when i beat you, popeye. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it does look like popeye. all right. [ laughter ] >> could you just go, "i am what i am?" >> jimmy: i'm not going to say "i am what i am."

[ audience ohs ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: joel mchale! "community" airs thursday at 8:00 p.m. on nbc. al roker joins us next. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ the computall day, you'd think i want to stay away from it at night. truth is, i like to stay connected with friends. but all that screen time can really dry me out. so i use visine. aah. it revives me, so i can get poked, winked, and -- ooh -- party all night long. only visine has hydroblend -- a unique blend of three moisturizers that soothe, restore, and protect to keep me comfortable for up to 10 hours. pirate party, here i co-- uh, honey? visine with hydroblend. find it in these visine products. [ sniffs ] i took dayquil but my nose is still runny. [ male announcer ] truth is, dayquil doesn't treat that. really? [ male announcer ] alka-seltzer plus

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest is a multiple emmy award winner who brings you the weather every morning on nbc's "the today show." he also has a new book entitled, "never goin' back: winning the weight-loss battle for good." he's an honorable man, a great weather man, we love him. [ laughter ] he's a friend of ours. ladies and gentlemen, please welcome back to the show al roker! ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: al, we love you. >> thank you. thank you. >> jimmy: al. >> thank you. you know, it's good thing you have that because when i kill you, i could wrap you in it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i have to make these

jokes. >> i know you do. no, you don't have to. [ laughs ] you want to. it's like the little cartoon devil on one side and the angel on the other. make the joke, make the potty joke. no, don't make the potty joke. >> jimmy: we have no material here. we have no jokes. [ laughter ] >> steve: you're smashing eggs on each other. >> jimmy: exactly. >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: all right, al. >> if my mom were still alive she'd go, "you know, there are starving children in africa who would love those eggs." >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. that's true. well no, they're -- they're -- >> they blotted you off very nicely. >> jimmy: i know, i still have no -- my pants are just totally -- >> oh, that's attractive. >> steve: aw! >> jimmy: yeah, well, you know what it's like. >> yeah, exactly. [ laughter and applause ] see? >> jimmy: i can't help it. >> you can't help it. >> jimmy: i can't help it. i have a 12-year-old brain. [ laughter ] i have to make these jokes. i have to congratulate you because of the "new york times" best-seller. >> thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] see, there's even -- there are

other jokes trying to come out. >> jimmy: it's number two on the best-seller list. >> exactly. [ laughter and applause ] you can't help yourself. >> jimmy: i can't help myself. i'm sorry. you should be in a 12-step program for potty humor. >> jimmy: al, al, i want you to walk me through this. >> okay. >> jimmy: 'cause you told the story, and i'm very interested about this because if this ever happened to me at white house -- >> right. >> jimmy: -- i would never tell anyone. >> right. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i wouldn't even tell my wife. i would just lie to her. i'd be like "well, we just met the president so let's just -- [ laughter ] -- get in the car. everyone goes home. you take the car and i'll --" i wouldn't tell anyone. >> sounds like your job interview for here. [ laughs ] >> jimmy: that's how it was, yeah. >> here's the deal. you know, i wanted to be honest about gastric bypass. a lot of people don't understand what goes into it, and it's "oh, you had a bypass. you took the easy way out." it's not. i mean, it's a serious operation. one in 200 people die, there are big problems, and if you eat the wrong thing -- i was only a month out from doing the -- from having the operation.

you know, i ate the wrong thing and it was embarrassing. but i -- i just felt like it wouldn't be honest not to tell the story. so -- and the title is "never going back." i've been back to the white house about seven times and there's never been a problem. >> jimmy: good. [ laughter ] very good. >> it worked out okay. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's a good thing. you're doing a good thing. >> that's a good thing. >> jimmy: now, you're saying gastric bypass -- you're saying don't do it? >> well, i don't recommend it. look, it worked for me, but like i said, it's dangerous. and so -- i mean, look, i was -- right before the operation, i was 340 pounds. and i had it back in march of 2002. i was 340 pounds. >> jimmy: i don't remember you being 340 pounds. >> well, you know what? if you look back at the video, it's like "holy crap!" >> jimmy: literally. [ cheers and applause ] i didn't say anything. i didn't say anything. i didn't say anything. >> i beat you. i beat you, fallon. i beat you at your own game. >> jimmy: i'm so upset. i'm so upset.

>> but i beat you. >> jimmy: yeah. i'm trying to think of a joke. >> yes, i know you are. [ laughter ] you had time, you could have written some down. >> jimmy: that's true, i did. what i like about this book is actually, you're saying that even though you did get gastric bypass surgery, the way you've kept the weight off is you actuly ride your bike to work. >> i do. >> jimmy: you eat healthy. >> i try to eat as healthy as i can, i exercise. my goal is to get good enough so that one day, i just walk in and kill my trainer and walk away. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] but you have recipes in here and all that stuff. >> all that stuff. >> jimmy: which is great, i like that. i want to talk about this crazy blizzard. >> yes. >> jimmy: the country is on lockdown. >> yes, the weather channel has named it nemo. >> jimmy: nemo. >> nemo. >> jimmy: why? >> just keep swimming, swimming, swimming. >> jimmy: yeah, why would they call it nemo? >> well, they had a list of names and somebody liked pixar movies. >> jimmy: so what is it? the northeast is just going to get -- >> well, it's going to be really bad up in boston, up in massachusetts along the new england coast.

we're talking upwards of maybe two feet. here in the city, it's probably going to be anywhere from 8 to 12 inches. >> jimmy: yeah. you're the only weather man i trust. >> thank you. >> jimmy: and watch. i wake up with al. >> yes. on the weather channel. >> jimmy: yes, i do. i wake up with al. >> at 5:30 in the morning. >> jimmy: yeah, actually that's when i go to bed. yeah, just come back from the club. >> it's been a rave. >> jimmy: yeah. >> hang out with questlove. >> jimmy: i go to the gangnam style. and then i get home at 5:30. >> you've got the green suit, don't you? >> jimmy: i do have that, yeah. and i'm doing a pistachio commercial. [ laughter ] so, should we be worried, should we not be worried, is it all going to be fine? >> no, you should be worried. >> jimmy: i should? >> yeah, you should. you should be worried. >> jimmy: no. no, i'm sorry. >> no, no, no. people really need to take it seriously because we got a blizzard warning right now for the new york city area from tomorrow afternoon into saturday morning. >> jimmy: oh, really. >> yeah. >> jimmy: so it's going to start in the afternoon? >> it's going to start in the afternoon. we'll get a little rain and snow here in the morning, then it's going to change over to all snow, it's going to be really windy and it's going to be a mess. [ laughter ]

>> jimmy: i'm not going to do it. >> no! >> jimmy: i'm not going to do it. i can't. you know why? >> unbelievable. >> jimmy: because i love you. >> i love you, too. >> jimmy: i love you, al roker. >> come on over here. >> jimmy: you're a good sport. >> don't squeeze too hard. >> jimmy: oh my gosh. al roker, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] he's a good man. watch al on "the today show" weekday mornings here on nbc. go pick up the new book, "never goin' back: winning the weight-loss battle for good" in stores right now. matt pond performs next. come on back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

♪ [ cheers and applause ]

>> jimmy: our next guest just released his ninth album, "the lives inside the lines in your hand." and he's here tonight to perform a song from it called "love to get used." please welcome matt pond. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ in athabasca we set a fire to the world we left far behind ♪ ♪ all the faces we put away lost lives float into space ♪ ♪ i got a message i got a sign through the wires swinging in time ♪ ♪ it's so simple it's like the sun shines down on everyone ♪ ♪ black bird from the blue

well, i give my love to get used ♪ ♪ high hopes they come true you give your love to get used ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ in athabasca we lit a fire to the path that led to our lives ♪ ♪ quit the faces we couldn't place every mind that fill up our space ♪ ♪ i got a signal i got a sign from the trees swinging in time ♪ ♪ it's so simple it's like the sun shines down on everyone ♪ ♪ black bird from the blue well, i give my love to get used ♪ ♪ high hopes come true you give your love to get used ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ ♪ let's hang on to abandon let's hope we lose control to be out in the open baby and let go of the ropes ♪ ♪ nothing into nothing ♪ black bird from the blue well, i give my love to get used ♪ ♪ high hopes come true you give your love to get used ♪